Empowerment for Women
We, as women, are brought up to be nurturers, to take care of everyone else.
We are so good at reminding our spouse or boyfriend, to call his mother on
her birthday, get the perfect gift for his boss, and don't forget to
remind him about doctor appointments. We tell our children to believe in themselves,
speak up for themselves and hold their head up high. My question is, who does
that for us?
As women, we are taught to give and give, to nurture, love, and protect. The
other message we receive is that by neglecting ourselves we are being unselfish.
This is seen as a positive action. On the other hand, if we ask, "what
about me?" we are called selfish and ungrateful. Well, I have news for
you, ladies … they were wrong. It is not selfish to take care of yourself,
it is actually healthy. And the biggest lie ever, is to believe that you can
empower your children and have them feel self-confidant, when you deny yourselves
those things which nurture you. Children follow the example of what you do,
how you act, and how you treat yourself, not what you say.
High self-esteem and self-confidence, unfortunately does not come automatically
with birth, it has to be taught. Unless you were one of the few fortunate ones,
who had parents who knew and practiced unconditional love and support, you
were probably raised by parents, who did the best they could, coming from their
own childhood of criticism and negativity.
That is where empowerment comes in. The time is NOW to work on feeling empowered.
Many ask me, what do I mean by empowered? I am talking about self-confidence
of course, but more than that, it is KNOWING that we can handle it. Whatever
life throws at us, we will find a way to deal with it. It is the opposite feeling
of powerlessness and contrary to feeling like a victim or a martyr. It comes
from having been through very tough times, and coming out, not only a survivor
but victorious. Empowerment is something we all deserve to feel, It makes us
redefine life. We start seeing obstacles as challenges. We see failures as
learning experiences, and fear of the unknown, which used to paralyse us, is
now approached with determination and knowledge that we can get through it.
We now know, we have the skills, the capabilities and the belief that nothing
can stop us now.
In my private practice, my approach is to guide my clients towards feeling
empowered. This alleviates depression, anxiety, feeling powerless and feeling
stuck. It is more than just being positive, it is a decision to take back control
over your life and refusing to give anyone or anything the power to make you
doubt your self-worth or capabilities. Just think how this knowing and belief
can inspire your children, partner, and friends. Just imagine the ramifications
you will have in your life, when you are feeling empowered and have learned
to dance with life rather than endure. What a gift for 2005!
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